This has given birth in recent years to a new industry - books, movies and "advice" all designed to help us, or more accurately, force us, to be happy. We are told of the benefits - improved health, a more rewarding career, and an enjoyment of life - all true.
But to truly understand being happy, we need only to look at our own childhood, a period of innocence, free of judgement - a time in which we were in awe of everything around us.
We then realize that happiness is not dependent upon the outside world. It's not something we look for and then find. It's not something we get from other people. It's not something that's hard to do. It's not even an emotion to be felt here and there.
Rather, happiness is a perpetual state of being - the way we are.
The 12 Ways to Support Happiness in Your Life
I believe there are things we can do to nurture, encourage and stimulate our state of happiness.
1. Start the day this way: Play your favorite music in the morning. Play it loud and give a little dance. Music has the power to clear the mind of its endless clutter and sets a positive tone for the day.
2. Stop the fight: We fight things because we are in a hurry. Everything becomes a struggle and nothing happens quickly enough. If we change our outlook to allow things to take as long as they take, we are able to free ourselves from the "hurry" syndrome plaguing much of society.
"For every minute you are angry you lose sixty seconds of happiness."
― Ralph Waldo Emerson
3. Change the program: All day long, every day, we talk to ourselves. Even in sleep. Our inner voice is a never-ending narrative which, if connected to a magic machine that could turn our thoughts to audio, would sound like the ramblings of a complete mad man. While it's impossible to stop the mind's chatter, write down these words to say to yourself: "I actually like myself right now. I'm okay. I've got talents and skills and a good heart." Once a day, program something nice about yourself, to yourself.
4. Do what you love: We hear this all the time from experts. But the truth is, for most people in the world, having a "dream" job is just that - a dream. However, we can still do things within our occupation, and most certainly outside of it, that gives us pleasure. Do what you love, even if, and especially if, there is no monetary gain.
5. See yourself from above and laugh: If you do something silly, look at yourself from 10,000 feet up and laugh at that person. Many of us take ourselves far too seriously. This is unnecessary, counter-productive and repels others.
6. Don't over-analyze: In my youth, I would over-analyze every conversation and everything that happened to me. There was no room for just being happy. We must learn to let things go for the only person we are hurting is ourselves.
"Happiness in intelligent people is the rarest thing I know."
― Ernest Hemingway
7. Don't supress emotions: Let yourself feel whatever comes upon you. Do not suppress sadness. Let it run its course. All emotion is part of the human experience and is designed to take place within the overall state of happiness.
8. Don't fake it: There are those who recommend we fake our happiness in the hopes that it will turn real. There is no such thing as faking happiness. This is akin to saying "Fake living".
9. Accept others for who they are: We often become frustrated with people because they don't conform to how we feel they should think and act. Let us not try to change others. Their flaws and imperfections are among the components that make them who they are.
10. Use the language of happiness: The words used in our daily language affect our subconscious mind more than we realize. Don't say "I hate..." Use as many "happy" phrases as you can through the day: "This is easy" "I find it interesting" "I am comfortable right now" "Welcome!" "That's a lot better" "I agree with what you're saying" and of course, "Awesome!".
11. Be moderately busy: Boredom can result in a state of unhappiness so strive to be busy, but not so busy that you are overly stressed. The goal is "moderate" busyness.
"You will never be happy if you continue to search for what happiness consists of."
― Albert Camus
12. Be accepting of things you cannot control: Millions will curse tomorrow morning's traffic and weather, putting themselves in a bad mood. Let us learn to accept all things we cannot control and be the happier for it.
Count your age by friends, not years. Count your life by smiles, not tears."
― John Lennon
One could argue that happiness takes practice. I would agree that we need to make a point of putting these techniques into our daily lives and not forgetting to do them. Over time, the state of happiness will form.
Once the foundation is firmly in place, it is there permanently. It will arm us with the power to endure whatever comes our way in business and in life.
We were not put on this planet to be unhappy.
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